Posts Tagged ‘spit’

I had my inaugural ride with the Elf Hill Bike Chicks on Thursday, only it was just 2 of us. 19 miles, flattish terrain. My fearless and patient leader, Sue, gave me some great tips, things that if I learned back in my 20s, I had mostly forgotten. I put some of these tricks to good use on my 45-minute ride this afternoon.

Today’s greatest lesson, one that has not yet embedded itself in my neural pathways: DO NOT OPEN YOUR MOUTH WHEN YOU RIDE! Not to smile at other cyclists, not at the cheery sound of the red-winged blackbird who trills as you pass by; not because you think you are getting ever more tiny wrinkles at the juncture of your upper lip and philtrum when you wince and pucker your mouth shut. NO NO NO, you must zip it (I will be experimenting with ways to keep my lips relaxed in the process).

The little insect that made its way into your mouth and did not exit with your saliva projectile* and proceeded to grapple itself onto the right side of your tongue, with its minute grappling hooks, does not want to be inside your mouth any more than you want it there. I had to pull the little bugger off with my fingers. It was disturbing.

on its website, this image was listed as public domain; how wonderful is that?

I felt much happier on my ride today, so even though this is only the 2nd post in the series, I didn’t feel compelled to post someone giving the finger. The photo I chose, though perhaps less crass, is more unsettling, don’t you think?

*must master better spitting technique. never accomplished this in my 20s. Too girly? Not likely, because when I was a smoker, I did gain a proud habit of spitting. I CAN DO THIS! But I hate the word hocker. EWW!

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